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Articles by
Patrick Crooks
Patrick Crooks is a Brooklyn-based writer where, among other things, he instigates feuds with ’70s pop stars for the Hard Times, and occasionally does stand up despite his crippling anxiety. He is single and childless.
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January 13, 2022I Can’t Help but Notice That This is the Thirteenth Month in a Row I’ve Been Featured as HR’s Commitment to Diversity
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November 8, 2021Your Lack of Red Flags Is Stifling Me Creatively
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September 16, 2021The Founders Would Like to Remind You They’ve Been Dead for Nearly Two Hundred Years
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June 16, 2020An Open Letter to the College Roommate I’ve Barely Spoken to Since Freshman Year Who Keeps Referring to Me as His Black Friend
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May 17, 2024If Trump Wins, I’m Going to Have to Move to Canada to Be Closer to My Long-Distance Girlfriend, Lisa
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May 17, 2024Excerpts from The Believer:: Take the W: Entry Points
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May 17, 2024The Handmaid’s Tale or Harrison Butker’s Commencement Speech?
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May 16, 2024Hi, Architectural Digest, Welcome to My Home (That I Don’t Live In)