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Itinerary of a Parent Chaperoning a Field Trip, as Imagined by Their Middle Schooler
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Other Trump White House Food Acronyms
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Bad Kissing Techniques
The Duck: They peck you four times on the lips, then they lean back and stare at you like they want some bread. -
Being a Stay-at-Home Mom Makes Me So Horny All I Can Think About Is Getting Pregnant Enough Times to Earn a Medal
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You Can’t Make an Omelette without Exploding Several Billion Dollars’ Worth of Eggs
“Look, things explode. It’s just part of nature. Cybertrucks explode, and it’s no big deal. So why should we spend so much time harping on how frequently our rockets explode, when we could, instead, focus on how long they haven’t exploded?”
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May 19, 2025A Company Reminder for Everyone to Talk Nicely About the Giant Plagiarism Machine
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May 20, 2025The Problem with My City Is That It’s a City
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May 9, 2025Unsung Heroes of Motherhood
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November 5, 2013How I Met McSweeney’s: #1
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May 8, 2025An Open Letter to Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Who Thinks My Daughter Is a Tragedy
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May 30, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Sisyphus in the Capital
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May 28, 2025Reviews of New Food: Skittles POP’d Freeze Dried Candy
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May 23, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Object: Joey Lawrence’s Flannel
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May 20, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Margaret Ross
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May 16, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Ask Carrie, Spring 2025
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May 15, 2025Reviews of New Food: Pringles Hot Ones Los Calientes Rojo Crisps
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May 13, 2025Hello, I’m New Here
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May 28, 2025I Am Pam Bondi’s Shiny Gold Cross Necklace
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May 28, 2025The Blockbuster Manifesto: How to Stop Writing Boring Poems
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May 27, 2025Decoding Cat Adoption Biographies
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May 27, 2025Of Course I Wash My Water Bottle Every Day, Sometimes
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May 23, 2025Addendum to the Ban on Harvard’s Enrollment of International Students
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